written by Christine

Chapter 18

(Five years later)
(36 years prior to Otherworld)

“You dropped your guard,” Isabo said calmly to the irritated six-year-old. InuYasha picked up his wooden sword and charged at her again. She easily knocked it away.

“If you have the right frame of mind when you draw that sword, it will transform into a great blade capable of defeating any opponent,” Isabo told him.

“What do you mean ‘right frame of mind’?” InuYasha asked.

“Why do you waste the time, Mother?” a man’s voice interjected.

Isabo swung around and came face to face with her son.

“A hanyou like that will never be able to handle Tetsusaiga.” You should just hand the sword over to me.”

“WHY YOU…” InuYasha shouted as he charged the man that insulted him, swinging his wooden sword.

“This sword is useless,” Sesshomaru said shaking its hilt. “It can’t even help me in a fight.”

You have plenty of power to defeat whomever you come up against without the assist of any sword.”

“And if I come up against a dragon like Ryuukoysusei? Will you let your son die as you did my father?”

“What?”

“I saw you! You had Ryuukoysusei defeated at the dens. You could have killed the dragon if you had gone after him! Instead you left the chase and returned to heal me! You had the vision; you knew Father would die at that dragon’s hands. You should have let me die and saved my father by killing Ryuukoysusei! Then, afterwards you add insult to injury by coming here to help raise this bastard hanyou!”

InuYasha renewed his useless struggle to get free.  This demon had now insulted him twice!

“InuYasha is not a bastard. His mother and your father were mated. Your father asked me to watch over them. I have never regretted the duty. As to saving you that day, I never regretted that either. I had no idea your father was going after the dragon until he ran by us. I loved your father! If I could have cheated the fates I would have!”

“Loved him? How can you say that when you let that dragon live and father die? He still lives… I’ve seen Ryuukoysusei, Mother. He may be sealed to that cliff face with Father’s claw but that seal could be broken at any time and he would once again roam the world. You’ve abandoned us and left our fate hanging by a claw.”

“Us?”

“Yes, us. One of my siblings still lives. You don’t even know which one, do you? Maybe if you had stayed home you would have found out.”

“Sesshie…”

“Since you’re not going to give me the sword I might as well leave.” His eyes dropped to little InuYasha. “Someday I will kill you and Tetsusaiga will be mine,” he said to the boy. The Dog Demon Lord turned and strolled off.

“Sesshie… Sesshie… You can’t kill him!” She called after him, “He’s your brother.”

There was no response from the disappearing figure.

“Isabo, was that my brother?” InuYasha asked.

“Yes sweet one, your half-brother, Sesshomaru, Dog Demon Lord of the Western Lands of Demon World.”

“We have the same father?”

“Yes,” Isabo responded.

“And you’re his mother?”

“Yes.”

“Why does he hate you and me?”

“You, he shouldn’t hate. He’s envious of the sword your father gave you.”

It was more than that but Isabo felt the boy didn’t need to know all the details surrounding his conception and birth.

“As for me, I had to make some hard decisions that affected both our lives and he has not yet come to terms with them," she continued.

“What kind of decisions?”

“Somebody is asking too many questions about things that he's  not ready to hear.”

A shout came up from the field below. “INUYASHA!”

“Look Inu, there is Kikyo and Nami. Why don’t we leave off practice until later? Go play with your friends.”

Isabo looked toward the children.  She was so glad that InuYasha had some friends.  It was hard on him and his mother.  All these years later and they were still shunned.  Even she was not accepted, used but not accepted.  Now she just found out that her son, her beloved first son, hated her.  She turned and walked up the hill a bit further.  It was this cliff where she first saw Inutaishou. Isabo sat on the cold ground and could no longer hold back the tears.

“Oh Inutaishou, how did things go so wrong?” she sobbed. “I’ve lost Sesshomaru and now I find out another one of our children survived and I don’t even know which one. I’ve probably lost that one too.”

She felt a gentle understanding hand on her shoulder as Izayoi joined her.

“It must be hard for you,” she said.

“You heard?” Isabo asked as she quickly wiped the tears off her face.

“Yes, but I already suspected. You knew too much about Inutaishou, things even I didn’t know."  Izayoi said.  "Why did you come here Isabo?  I would have thought you'd stay with your family."

"It was his wish that I take care of you and InuYasha."

"But look at what you gave up and for whom?  I laid with your husband and begat his child.  I know he committed to me but I'm a realist.  It was you he loved.  If you ever returned, I knew I would lose him.  When you first held InuYasha, I knew who you were.  You were too accepting of him.  That was the moment I knew the dream had ended."

"I'm sorry Izayoi."

"Don't be.  You're losses were far greater than mine.  I knew what I was getting into.  I was in love and wanted nobody else.  I do know he loved me, not like he did you, but he loved me and he gave me a son so I will always have a piece of him near me."

"But you were expelled from your people, your family."

"Even so, I'd do it all again.  Do you hate me?"

"Hate you?  How can I hate you?  You gave Inutaishou comfort and love when I couldn't. You've become my best friend and you and your son have kept me going despite all the painful losses.  I have a few regrets. Being here to help you is not one of them."

They paused, watching the children whom seem to be having an intense conversation.

"You should go, you know.”

“Go?” Isabo looked at her friend. She looked so pale today.

“To find your missing child. You’ll have no peace until you do.”

“I don’t know where to start.”

“It doesn’t matter where. Just look and let your heart guide you.”

Isabo hesitated, looking again toward the children talking in the field.

"Don't worry, I manage until you get back," Izayoi said.

Against her better judgment, she nodded and stood. Isabo transformed into her Unicorn form.

"You know," Izayoi commented, "it never ceases to amaze me how beautiful your true form is."

Isabo placed her muzzle on Izayoi. She didn’t feel right. She's anemic again, Isabo thought. She applied her healing power but knew it was only a temporary fix. The lungs and heart were failing on her friend and there was little Isabo could do about it but keep the inevitable at bay as long as she could.  Isabo vowed she would only be gone a week. This healing should hold out that long.

“Tell the children I’ll be back in one week,” she mentally said to Izayoi and off she went, not toward where Sesshomaru went but toward the old dens where she last saw her children alive. It was the fifth anniversary of their death. She'll start there and pay tribute to the love ones she lost. Then maybe with a few clues, she’ll be able to start hunting for the living.

Song - "End of the World" - from :Hack Sign Soundtrack

Read the companion story:  "One Bead at a Time"